The part that struck a chord with me is the fighting dirty and the fact that you're on the brink or feel like it, of breaking up every time you fight. It sounds so similar to the 13+ yr marriage/relationship I had with my ex. The threat of divorce came up invariably with every fight that was anything more than a mild disagreement. I lived in fear that this would be the last time, that this would be the fight that she actually leaves. I gave up a lot for the marriage, to keep it together, to keep her happy and I submitted way too much. I feel like it was her way to manipulate me to backing down in the argument and just give in to her..

In the end, she did leave anyway and I don't think there was anything I could have done to keep that from being the end result.

I can't say this is happening to you nor if this is the outcome of your relationship but I think it's notable enough, the similarities, that It was worth mentioning.

I hope it at least gives you some insight.

At the very least, before you tie the knot, please get pre-marital counseling.