I wrote a long reply to this and lost it, Sorry if this one isn't as passionate.

I can totally understand why you are feeling the way you are. Sometimes it is hard to hear things even if they are truth, so I am truly sorry that you are feeling down about today's session.

On one hand, you've only been seeing your T since March, and I honestly don't feel like things like this can be completely resolved in a few months. The roots are much deeper and the behaviors are engrained in the client and these things just take time. I am sure that T realizes this, or at least I hope so, since this is her specialty. I can understand why her words may have felt like a stab to the heart but I don't feel like she had harmful intentions behind it. I don't know much about you/your T's dynamics, so I am only going off of what i read on this post. I think you two were having an open and honest conversation and she was simply expressing an agreement/validation to your own argument. I don't think that she meant, in any way, "I want to give up on you" although, I can imagine why intrusive thoughts could suggest that.

On the other hand, you stated that you feel like you are "repeating the same stuff week after week and outside of therapy not making any significant changes in your behavior or thoughts." It simply sounds to me that its not time to give up, but to find an alternative approach to your situation/circumstance. On the days that you are truly feeling motivated, why not try to identify (through working with T or writing down and sharing with T) where exactly that motivation is stemming from and try to tap in and expound upon that.

Lastly, you stated that "as soon as things become uncomfortable I go back to my old ways" - that is perfectly okay. I think you should be less encouraged if things were perfectly fine and comfortable and yet you find yourself regressing. But you have identified that you want to change and change is hard! It's not an easy process, and I have all the faith in the world that you can do this. So what if you've been a bit stubborn - you haven't given up on yourself and I don't think (hope not) that T is giving up on you either. Maybe the two of you, in addition to identifying motivating factors can try to identify those stubborn feelings/times and address ways to move past those inhibitions that creep up.

I honestly think that you can do this, and I really don't think T meant her statement in the context your intrusive thoughts spinned them. I think the best thing would be to address your T with these thoughts, take note on your motivated and stubborn moods and causes and together, regroup and come up with a new plan of action. And if that doesn't work, you can come up with yet another.

Keep up the good work and motivation, I know you have the capability to overcome this.