Hi secretwhisper-thank you for coming back. I know this is going to sound stupid and I know that when there is so much pain and hopelessness and despair any suggestion about hanging on might seem pointless but I'm going to try anyway. First of all, as I wrote, I can empathize with the anguish of feeling that there is too much pain to continue. I struggle with that consistently. But there is something that I try to hang onto and it comes from an idea that I cannot dispute-there is no way to know what will happen tomorrow. Yes, it might seem like nothing will ever change after living years, maybe even a life time, of anguish and despair. It might seem ridiculous to think that there is any possible way that things will be a little easier tomorrow or the next day or that something will happen that we didn't think possible-that something being a ray of light, a ray of hope, that will help us find some peace. But ending things is definitive, ending things does end that possibility. I ask that you try to take in that people do care about you. I don't know about your relationships with your friend or your family but there are people here who understand and who care about you and who do not want to lose you. I am one of those people. I know you don't know me but I do care. I suggest that you continue to talk to people here and that you contact a hotline and talk to someone. Please come back and let us know how you are and please get help. You deserve caring and understanding and compassion. And please remember you do not know what will happen in the future-no matter what happened in the past.