a 22 year old child that is asking a disabled parent for money needs some toughlove. he is already living "off" of you, as it is. he's old enough to drink and vote........he's old enough to support himself.

the longer you "enable" his behavior, the harder it is going for him to realize that he has to grow up and be responsible for himself. "enabling" means that we keep stepping in and the child never fully learns that they need to stand on their own two feet. if you don't quit, do you want him living with you when he's 27? that is just five short years. by then he may have a girlfriend/wife/child that you are supporting.

i know that this is blunt. but there is no gray when it comes to our enabling our children to remain dependent upon us. that shouldn't be what we're aiming for. we aim to send them out into the world and teach them to be responsible for themselves.

obviously, i don't believe in giving grown kids a free home or money. xoxoxo pat