None of my previous relationships have been healthy....one was down to an extremely abusive older man and the others have been because of me. I don't think I should be in a relationship, I torture my husband who I have been with for 14 years. It would be healthy if I was healthy mentally but I am far from it and abuse my husband to no end in sight. I sometimes wish he would leave me and go live a happy life with someone who deserves him. I am a monster.

Sorry you have problems of your own