Hi - good for you for finding this forum. I just read your profile and see that you like cats and movies. Cats are so nice. And you're in the Montreal area - a city with much to offer. Your partner could be very ill (that cancer) - so hopefully she has a good doctor - I mean some things might be a somewhat beyond her control. It's kind-hearted of you to stay and be supportive for her. And I'm sure that it's difficult for her to have to accept this cancer. Has she always been difficult, negative, with a "horrible temper" while drinking a lot? But your own self-care - find some ways to expand your own social support network - you can take classes, do volunteer work, take on a job if you have time, take some art classes (one of my answers to just about everything) - meet some new people, make some new friends and acquaintances. Find some ways for you to have some distance from this toxicity. Or could the both of you go for some partner counselling or therapy?