My 19 yr. old brother-in-law, Kevin, was brutally murdered 4-14-06. I also lost 6 others within 10 mos. (4 to drugs or violence) People say I'm obsessed w/death, but I can't remember anything else lately. Kevin was the worst. We were very close & he never leaves my mind. Sometimes I can't breathe, literally. I have anxiety disorder, but it's worse than that. I've been prescribed Xanax, Klonopin, & now Valium 10 mg, 3x a day. It doesn't work anymore. My Grandma just died 1-4-07. My brother says I'm obsessed w/death. What else is there to think about when that's all that has been happening? I have 4 kids and a loving husband, whose been so strong and Kev was his little brother. I'm losing touch w/ all of them though because I'm scared. I worry all the time. Does anyone have any suggestions?