I think Asia is right that a T can't ultimately meet those needs - as my T explained it to me, he can do things that symbolise meeting those needs, but don't actually fill the gap left by them not having been fulfilled. However, I would hope your T would help you deal with those feelings.

Mine has been working on helping me understand that I can't catch up, but I can grieve my losses, when I'm ready to, and move on. If you're spending every session in a state of unbearable misery, one of two things is happening: either your T isn't helping you, or you're not asking for the help you need.

A no-touch therapist isn't right for everyone. It isn't wrong for everyone. My T does hold my hand when I ask, but I also have strict mental boundaries in place with myself - while I see him as some kind of parental figure, I have banned myself from fantasising about him being my actual parent, as then the reality of the therapeutic relationship will seem like a poor second choice.

Have you talked to your T about any of this?