Hi Undivide, Well, You say you have been through counseling and worked out your issues, but seriously reading your post I am thinking you have a few to work out.
Even if you do not want to or are afraid of getting married again, dont you think it would help your relationship with your BF if you could work on at least feeling comfortable in a family setting?
Obviously you still have trust issues, so if you really love your BF and do not want to eventually lose him over this then I would seek your counselors help again.
I do not think you want to be alone because of your past so work on your future.