This is a tough one. There is always the fear, even the possibility, that the person who is stable will resent you one day for needing so much...no family is "perfect" but clearly he may have a hard time understanding your behavior----be as honest with him as you can be, instead of pushing away, talk about why you want to push. You probably need to take this relationship slower than he does, and if he is wonderful and wants you, he will stay.
Any relationship is a risk. Only you know if you can take that risk.