Welcome to PC!
I'm seeing, in the most general sense, a great deal of anxiety, some depression/isolating, a lot of impulsivity. As you've mentioned yourself, I see some BPD traits here, but who knows, and traits don't mean full-blown disorder.
These things are so complicated, but it's good that you're starting to try to figure it out. I would definitely get a referral/make an appointment for a psychiatric evaluation. I'd caution to keep an open mind, though, about possible diagnoses, and just try to be as honest and open as possible with the pdoc -if you report things with a particular diagnosis in mind (whether it's BP, BPD, or something else) it could potentially color your interpretation of your moods/behavior.
In preparation for your appointment, it might be a good idea to track your moods (what you're feeling, for how long, what triggers your moods and thoughts); I'd expect a good pdoc to spend some time getting to know you, even if it means initially holding off on a definitive diagnosis until they know you better. Best of luck!
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