less than half a sleep to go...
i have to set my alarm for 5.30am in order to get in to see him at 8am
i'm a sleep at 3am wake at 10am kinda gal
so i find it hard to sleep before i see him
so only half a sleep really
just a bit less than 7 hours to go
less than a sleep and i don't feel tired yet
i can't believe it
i can't belive it

how humiliating... something is wrong with me :-(

we had a really good talk today. this guy... he used to be my supervisor. a while ago now. when i was fairly fragile. so incredably nervous of others. his opinion meant the world to me. i struggled with him, though. about whether he took me seriously. he reccomended me, though. to his colleagues. his reccomendation goes a long way. but i saw him today. was telling him about work i had been doing. work i emailed him to look at. he wasn't interested. he is interested in his stuff is all. he gave a talk. i thought he misinterpreted. i told him so. i'm bolder now. i can say what i think now. everybody else does and i've always been a quiet little mouse. far too nervous. but today i told him what i thought. he wasn't so interested in my take. polite... but not so interested.

well stuff him. i think he is wrong. i feel a paper coming on... in defence of someone who... i should be spending a couple months working with this year. i need to clarify his position. he says x and then he says not x. this guy thought he really meant x because not x is crazy. i though he really meant not x and this guy missed the point.

i'm going to send him an email. 'you seemed to say x and not x. is that right? do you think that is contradictory? if you had to give up one of those which one would you give up'?

we will see what happens. i see a publication coming on.

brilliant brilliant man. i just... find myself disagreeing. but... it is supposed to be like that isn't it? when all you have is positions and arguments positions and arguments.

:-)