[quote=BlueInanna;3371659]Dammitdammitdammit!!!! She can't see me until Monday
Isn't it ironic?! *enter maniacal laughter*. I want to break something but I won't. Dammit. I want to be well & fine and tell her I don't need an appointment...
Maybe I won't need an appt & meds by Monday - if I weather through this episode, I could likely have a long period of stability.
No answer feels right. So disappointed & irritated. Weird things cross my mind to get hospitalized cuz I'm curious. I'd be caged but maybe I'd get the rest I need.
Screw this stupid system. [/quot..

...so sorry C, you really having a skull eruption!

I understand it...
one thing I remember is that I am typically the only one who knows just how bad it feels..

and that is never good enough with rage pure fury
...
I could tell the day would end up with a night fighting with cops and hospital guards strapped dribbling to a bed thing...

it's difficult so bad being unable to stop choosing the agonising validation than something much more gentle

..and yet whats worse is the streetwise self smarts to avoid all the crap and sit around with emotional lava in your head!

I hope you will be ok C