I've experienced what you are experiencing now...only I had just two children. I was also drinking to try to lift the depression. I felt such sadness. My husband couldn't understand. He would say, "You have nothing to be sad about."

But I did reach out & try to get help through therapists. I didn't get the best treatment in the world, that's for sure, but Ididn't give up & now at age 52 (yes, it took that long for me--it won't for you) I've got a correct diagnosis & medication & treatment plan. Do reach out for professional help, please. You shouldn't have to suffer like this.--Suzy