Illegal, I really like and admire many of your comments. We have a similar situation in our family, and there is much misery associated here, too. So I can relate. All you can do is try to focus more on the good, however, smalll, than what you perceive as the bad. And engage in some healthy and happy activities that will distract you when you are able. I wish you the best. I know life can be a real challenge!