Quote:
Originally Posted by SirGoliath
I'm going to try counseling on my own b/c he doesn't think he needs help. He blames me & other people for the drama in his life but it's him.
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I must be strong & move on b/c he isn't any good for me or my son. I don't want my son to believe that a man should treat his lady & behave the way my bf has.
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That's good you realize he is creating this drama. Drama is the word I thought when I started to read your story. I would not accept all this drama in my life. I stopped talking to my own sister recently because of this level of drama. It's too stressful!
Yes, if you accept this drama, you are teaching your son this is how life is. Why would you even put yourself through this, let alone your son?!? (Rhetorical question. No answer needed.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by SirGoliath
I've given him so many chances. I've asked myself if I'm expecting too much from him? Why am I so disappointed by him all the time? Maybe he isn't capable of giving me what I need in a relationship. He's hurt me a lot but I'm sure I've hurt him too. I didn't throw other men in his face b/c I didn't seek other men.
He does the minimum in our relationship. If it doesn't serve him, he doesn't get involved. We were at the grocery store a month ago & I was buying the groceries. My 8 yr old son wanted to help put the food on the belt & my bf became inpatient, said this was too dramatic for him b/c he wanted to get it done quickly & he walked out of the store, leaving my son & I alone at the store. We went home & he came home hrs later. I was shaken & hurt. I tried to let him see my side of things but he thinks it was my son's & my fault for not letting him put the food on the belt.
Even when we aren't arguing & getting along I feel unsettled & like something is missing. My mind regresses to when he said he "f'ed" other women & reetract my heart. It's a yo-yo & not fair to me or him! He hasn't even put my bed together & we moved into the house 4 months ago. I don't think he cares about us at all. There's so much that I don't ave the time to tell but he feels as though I wasn't fair to him. I've tried to be understanding & cater to his needs but I'm now thinking his blaming me is to gain sympathy from me & to make me more vulnerable to him so that I can bend in any direction he wants me to. Is it manipulation? I don't know him anymore.
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You mention in another post you come from an abusive background. Maybe that is why you consider accepting this crap from this person. You feel love despite the unlove you are being given. Go get some real love -- somewhere else. You sound like a caring person who is very capable of love. I wish you great love and joy. I think you can find it.