No need to apologize - you were just expressing your feelings. Because I don't really know you, I was only a tiny bit worried you meant it literally, but overall it didn't fit my impression of you.

As someone said, jumping is not reliable. I've looked into it, and pretty much nothing is reliable. A failed suicide attempt is worse than putting up with the continuing crap, in my view. Would make the crap worse, in fact.

I'm glad to hear you're feeling better!