I'm so disappointed and scared. My doctor reduced the Prozac and Lamictal because the Prozac was keeping me in a state of high anxiety and the Lamictal caused cognitive problems and made me ridiculously photo-sensitive. Xanax doesn't help with the anxiety. I went from 10 mg Prozac to 5 mg. In one week, I went from not feeling suicidal at all to feeling very suicidal. I called the doctor's office and the nurse blew me off. I kept giving it more time and got worse. I almost checked into the hospital a couple of times in the last two weeks. The nurse called to tell me that my doctor wanted me to go back onto the original dosage.

I'm back at the original dosages and feel different but not better. I'm just as suicidal - just not depressed. I'm now having panic attacks 24/7 again. I can't think. I shake and my heart is pounding. I just want to cry. I'm afraid my doctor won't change my meds and that I'll be stuck like this forever.

I was doing well for awhile - not feeling suicidal, moving forward in my life, actually thinking that maybe my hard work in therapy over the years was finally paying off. NO!!! All that was undone in a week. All because of a med change. *I* had nothing to do with becoming so depressed. It was the meds. By logical extension, *I* had nothing to do with my success. It was the meds. I feel so discouraged. Nothing I do affects my well-being. I'm solely at the mercy of medication. I can't live like this. I can't function like this. I'm convinced that I should quit school, give up all hopes of having a career, and just go on disability for the rest of my life. I'm just too unstable. The meds were the only reason I could stay out of bed long enough to go to school. Nothing is attributable to me.