I always self-harmed out of sheer frustration and anger. I notice a pattern of when I am not feeling heard or maybe even being treated badly (mocked, belittled, told my feelings aren't important) that I have the strongest urges to Si. But I don't know if its an attempt to punish myself or not it seems like its more of relief out of the emotional pain for me. The physical pain distracts me and makes the other pain immediately go numb.....not sure if that makes any sense /: