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Old Nov 02, 2013, 07:58 PM
Anonymous33445
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Drug induced you probably can but I don't think that you can intentionally. Here's something that I wrote, plagiarized from people that were doped up on risperidone (anti psychotic);

Life seems like nothing. I believe that this has caused me to be completely flat. I feel like I relive the same day over and over. I feel no emotions. When I watch tv nothing sinks in. I have been brain damaged one way or another. It has ruined my life. I no longer have a personality. I feel like I'm a dead person. My memory is gone. I feel like I'm disconnected from my body. No creativity, no Love to give. I often find myself walking around in a circle out of boredom and restlessness in my current state. I don't get any sensation out of anything and nothing feels good at all. I feel like I have no enthusiasm and I don't want to do anything. I never feel like doing anything like dancing and I don't have much energy. Running is a chore and doesn't feel good like it used to. I walk and talk like a dead person and I cannot move fast at all. People say that I look stoned or on dope. I can't join words together. I don't know how to describe it, just like part of my brain is disconnected and I can't think of anything to say. I can't stand the lethargic feelings. i feel flat every day and produce no emotion whatsoever when having conversations. I have never had a real conversation with anyone since then. Sometimes, I can't even think of a good response to say, it's like I'm not living anymore. It's very hard to get up in the morning and I have difficulty with my appetite. I look at the board at school and its just dead, no thoughts come across my mind. I am feeling this incredible boredom like nothing stimulates my brain. I no longer can genuinely laugh, cry, feel fear or remorse, get those deep feelings from movies/music/weather. Just basic functioning. Mostly I prefer to sleep as this state brings nothing, no joy or pleasure. Friends? Well I have had to wave goodbye to that... I don't feel anything after seeing aquatints or family like I used to. You know, that warm feeling of love and happiness you're supposed to get after seeing your family? I don't get that at all anymore. Well they all said it was depression blah blah and put me on anti depressants but that never cured it I still have to put up with this emptiness and after a while you just forget how you used to feel before it. I am supposed to do what is right for me, to think about the future, and just be happy in the present. Live day by day with no hate. It's my life, and I need to do exactly what will make me happy by trying to get a treatment by myself with months of research, having doctors ignore me when I say how I'm feeling.. it makes me week.. I'm starting to give up hope. I want to repetitively hit my hand with a hammer to feel something. It's a very disturbing feeling.
Hugs from:
Terraminator
Thanks for this!
Terraminator