Thank Ultmar, always so informative and helpful.
I started CBT with my therapist. Now I'm filling in charts on what I'm like when I'm mildly depressed, moderately depressed, normal, mildly manic, moderately manic etc. It is an amazing exercise although it's the first time I have to actually write this down and thus the confusion about what exactly is what. I'm very excited about this journey and aim to get to that place that you have somewhat mastered, to be able to realize states, spot triggers, change thinking, implement coping strategies and identify normal life stressors.
It takes work but I'm so prepared to do it and actually love getting to understand myself better.
Yay! Here's to helping the process help me!