Hello, I'm new to the board and I am finding it helpful to read about others' experiences with their therapists.

I will try to explain what is going on for me, but forgive me if I do not know what exactly "triggers" are (any particular words or phrases?)

I have a (normally!) wonderful therapist who's been treating me since I was nineteen (I'm in my 30's). Things are not so great lately. I think he's trying to get me to reach out to other people more but I'm not really in a place where I feel I can do what he is asking. My social anxiety is driving me out of my own skin, and it has been a long time since I have been this uncomfortable, uneasy and really unwell.

I can sense his frustration with me, as neither of us is getting any younger. He actually berated me by asking in a nasty tone of voice if I was going to let anyone in my life. I ended the session abruptly (don't think he expected that). He did end up apologizing but I feel like I want to fix this in a hurry, with each passing day until I talk to him next I feel more and more hopeless. He is taking great efforts to check in with me, which does feel good, but I just want our relationship to go back to being warm and caring again.

I feel so exhausted from crying. It feels like I will never be "better", whatever that means.