Your going to Dilike me for this.

To me it dose not sound like he is the one doing the abuse. Think about it, you say HE NEVER calls you name, but u admit that you are calling him names, although u think asshole and jerk are not mean, they probably hurt just as bad as Him calling you a *****. As for him wanting to go to the Gym after work... maybe he needs to release some tension, work off some steam. Yes taking care of a child ALL DAY alone is exausting and all you wanted to do was get some help from him. BUT if you let him spend an hour at the gym after he will be calmer and less fighting. Communication is key, seems to me you are picking fights and trying to control him, if he dose not do what you want him to do you get mad and upset. thats not a good way to be. Before trying to blame him for abusing you, look at yourself. Maybe you are being selfish.