I cry rarely in therapy and wish that I did more when we were talking about deep pain and trauma. I become numb and like there is this protective shield over my chest. The few times that I have cried (and never totally letting go) have felt good and cathartic. Why can I cry at an episode of Law and Order SVU and not over things that have happened in my own life? Only when I can really grieve and feel them will I get over them... I don't feel awkward crying around my T. At one point I think it scared me to do so, but no longer.

Can't believe I'm still so reticent about this, like in our appt on Saturday when I told her that I cut for the first time in over 6 months...