It is lovely to see you post a thread.

I'm sorry that you were invalidated as a child when you cried. That sounds really painful. Have you spoken to your therapist about how you feel it is helpful but dislike doing it?

Personally, I have cried a lot in therapy (I can't really imagine someone in therapy not crying at one time or another with the amount of painful stuff we have to deal with!). It has never been full-on, although there have been a few deeply painful moments where I've covered my eyes and sobbed a few times (then sat up straight and composed myself!). But generally I'll sit with a few tears coming down my face and I'll be determined not to wipe them away. I'm not sure why, perhaps I'm deeply sad but also angry and unconsciously saying "this time you can see my pain, I'm not going to hide it to make you feel better". Who knows.