I'm not quite sure how to snap out of this "obsession" mode. I had not si'd while sick, but it picked up as soon as I was well enough to not be high on cold medicine all day/night. I can't stop thinking about it, or planning when I can next escape to do some damage. I hate when it gets like this, because nothing pulls me out of it for long. I do not want to have to wind up in the hospital again just to make me stop, but it's looking like that will be the outcome :/ I see my T tomorrow, but I'm nervous about it. And if tomorrow is anything like today, more si to follow...