Thread: family
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Old Jan 13, 2007, 11:10 PM
tiodlliwi tiodlliwi is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2006
Posts: 93
Thank you SO much! Your responses really did help calm me down. I don't know why but I am just really freaking out about this lately. Maybe because it's new for me, maybe because I'm just over anxious in general, etc. Part of it is, as I find myself growing up, I'm seeing my parents in a different light as well as myself. As they are getting older, I am finding them to be critical and judgemental (not neccessarily towards me but that's what I worry about the most) and it bothers me.

ALSO, I've learned that while I always have considered my family to be close, I am now realizing that we never TALK ABOUT ANYTHING- or anything substantial anyways. So partially, I guess I feel guilty about pulling away based on me hiding my problems (things my husband and I have gone through, my anxiety, financial problems, etc) because I worry about their judgement or "I told you so" attitude. Therefore, our weekly phone conversations are dreaded for me, and it makes me anxious to get together with them because I don't want to talk about anything too deep.

Basically, I want my space and privacy during this time of trying to find myself, love myself, forgive myself, work on my relationships, and just grow in general.

So, I will take your advice and try not to feel guilty about distancing myself a little, both physically and mentally. Even though all they really have is us "kids" and their grandkids and if we don't come for a weekend, it's just the two of them sitting around, watching movies, being lonely? Ok, there's the guilt again. I'm trying, though!!!