im off to distract .I have T at 3 and my nail girl coming at 1 so got some time to waste .I have so much on my mind overwhelming me it is insane .I would want to talk to T about all of it but wont and then she is probably going to start this session with saying she wont be here again next week because Monday is a holiday and so she is going to take Tuesday off also. and that will be it for me . all this stuff that gets in my head is piling up more and more confusing things and my life .and going there at this point is just adding to the pile making it more painful. I don't know if these feelings are there or if they are there because of T. but it doesn't help to go there and pile more on at this point I wouldn't even know what to say .it is a huge overwhelming trap and I feel if I start to say anything it will just pile more because again I probably wont see her again next week .it has already been two weeks sence I have seen her last