Thanks I too wish I had the strength to leave him - I love him despite his behaviour but that takes its toll on me emotionally and physically and I do not know how much longer I can sustain this! Denial as you say is the problem if they are self-aware and seek therapy there is more of a chance but if they refuse to believe there is anything wrong with them and it is basically our fault! then realistically I can see little future. Anyway I wish you lots of love and luck