I used to feel that way.......I would never know what to say until long after the conversation passed on to another subject......which was very much like my parents were.......the difference now is that I'm 60 years old....I read & am well experienced in the activities I'm involved in.....when I first moved here, I actually joined the libraries reading club which met once a month after reading the book....it was the first time (6 years ago) that I actually read the book & retained what it was about & could actually hold an intelligent conversation with the others in the group......that was the starting of my getting confidence in realizing that I was capable of communicating with others. I had an engineering career that ended back in 1994.....I found with that when we had meetings with the military, I could talk about things that I knew really well....because I always refused to be like my father who always said things that were so wrong & so embarrasing any time he got in a conversation with other people & would end up in an argument trying to prove that he was right. Not wanting to be anything like him kept me quiet for most of my life except on things that I absolutely knew so thoroughly that there was nothing to fight or argue over & I knew I knew what I knew........

Having my mind free from the fighting that had been seriously going on in my marriage also freed my mind to be able to allow so much more into it....& it felt good to start learning & asking questions & putting thoughts together......not I almost have the opposite problem & I catch myself before I start talking too much......it's much nicer to blend in & have interesting conversations...........but sometimes it's just nice to listen also....& one can be just as much a part of a group through activity participation than just verbal conversation....obviously depending on the group.