Quote:
Originally Posted by Supanova
Yes they do get easier  Hold in there. The longer you go without the easier it gets to deal with. Of course I still have times when I have an urge, but the majority of the time I can talk myself out of it.
I will think about those I would let down, how upset my partner will be, I'll read old journal entries about how annoying and uncomfortable it is to be healing, how I would have to hid it from my friends and work mates, then what about if it gets infected? What if I have yet another longterm painful scar? What if a another skin growth comes up as a result of the cutting? These are all very real and very possible outcomes. What are the pros and cons of using cutting to relieve your symptoms? Its really a quick fix with more long term problems than solutions.
Yeah its easy to say all this stuff, I know it is much harder in practice. What about instead of self harming you self nurture? You're struggling right now, if you saw a child was struggling would you hurt them or help and care for them? |
It's good to hear that it gets easier. I was just surprised because things were starting to get easy, I felt no urges at all now they all come flying back at me. I know in the end if I do it I'll feel bad about it and do it even more and won't be able to stop myself. I might try this rubber band thing where you snap it on your wrist just to get a sting. These urges are coming from pure self hatred, which is something I need to work on. Sometimes I feel like cutting is the only thing that keeps me from doing worse and ending my life.
I'm going to try and start thinking of other people too, how would I feel if someone I cared about hurt themselves? I just feel like I'm wasting space in life right now, maybe getting that volunteer job I mentioned in another thread will help. I like helping other people.
Thank you for your reply, it really made me think about things a little differently. I'm trying very hard to keep up my progress.
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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
Diagnosis:
Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type
PTSD
Social Anxiety Disorder
Anorexia Binge/Purge type