I'm new to this forum so hello to everyone.

I have bipolar disorder I and have been diagnosed for about 12 years now. This past year I have really struggled with serious depression. I was hospitalized 3 times in this past year. Currently I am really struggling with some serious depression and am going to see if I can get into see my psychiatrist tomorrow or the next day.

My thinking has really gotten bad and it's scaring me. I thought that I'd try out this forum to see if there were any like souls out there who struggle in the same way. I really don't want to end up in the hospital again. In fact, I'm hesitant to even tell my husband about how poor my thinking is because (1) I don't want him to worry and (2) I would feel like I'm dumping a huge burden on him again after all that we've been through with the previous 3 hospitalizations.

I could really use any encouragement anyone has. Thanks.