I'm sorry your feeling this way.

It's common for BP'ers to feel hopeless and that leads to thoughts of suicide for many people. Bipolar runs in cycles .. You even typed " the bad always comes back" ... Proof that it is indeed a cycle.. an ugly cycle at times but a cycle indeed.

I don't know if you are on medications or not , maybe you need a second opinion from a new Pdoc 14 years is a long time to see a Pdoc do you like he/she? Do you like your current Therapist? Does your therapy have specific goals your working towards ? Sometimes it helps to actually tackle X problem and move on to another .

Do you feel your Pdoc and T are working to help you stay healthy and happy?

To answer your question ... If you are not a threat to yourself or others usually you won't get a one way ticket to the hospital.. I do think it would be wise to fill them in .. that way your treatment can be reviewed .. You obviously want help ...ask them for it.

Welcome to PC I hope you find the support here helpful