It sounds to me like he tries to warn people away, so he may feel more confident that those who stay/aren't scared off, are safer for him? It's a sort of pre-screening kind of like you asking us what we think? I think the religion thing is like that too; he doesn't like the extreme religion either and thinks/knows it is extreme and not what most people believe so he's warning you it is not like him (they may be extreme but he's not :-) I think the way his family believes is too extreme for him and makes him anxious because it is unusual?