I had two jobs like that, one right after the other. Half the time whatever I was being torn apart about was something I had specifically been told to do by them or just stupid stuff, like being assigned a client in the morning and yelled at the same afternoon because I hadn't MST with him yet (he wasn't free until the following day and I had scheduled an appt.).
Both of my supervisors who treated me this way were addicts. I knew it wasn't about me, it was about them, but it was still hard. I would literally be sick every Monday morning because if stress and felt terrible all the time.
With my first boss I just took it and tried to make it her happy by being perfect. Thing is, when you're in an abusive relationship there is no pleasing them, they are only happy when they are putting you down. With the second I finally had it one day and started flaring my nostrils while he was chewing me out. He was so mad and I was trying not to laugh. I then stood up to him and he fired me...well, kind of... he told me to find a new job. I had been looking for several months but was happy to have a job offer on my answering mmachine when I got home that day.
I am so sorry to hear you are stuck in the position I was in. I know it's hard, but remind yourself it's not you, it's them they are being disrespectful, unprofessional, and abusive. Do you have an advisor you can speak to?
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gnat
Dx: depression and anxiety
Tx: Rhodiola Rosea, humor, denial, dance, and wallowing in my own self-pity
My blog:
http://messedinthehead.psychcentral.net/
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