so today/yesterday, i was pretty productive!I was hoping my extreme happy/hyper/energetic mood would last a lot longer than it did.... i feel helpless right now. helpless over my emotions. I just wihs i could be happy all the time, and never fell into this depression state..... I have noticed that my lessons make me feel worse about myself, and it gets harder and harder to make myself go to them. The other thing is that i hate doing my theory homework because i feel it is SOOO STUPID to analyze music!!!! I can pretty much gaurantee the composers did NOT sit there, and say to themselves, "Oh, I think i'm gonna put a dominant chord here, then go to a tonic...." NO! Pretty sure they wouldn't have even KNOWN what that even was! Mozart heard the melody in his head and then wrote it down! He DEFINITELY didn't think about voice leading, and chords!!!! I miss my dog Lady soo much!!! It frustrates me that my family is like "Come home!" yet my lessons teacher is like "You're not going home this weekend are you!?!" and when i answer "no." he replies "Good call!" arghhhhhh. and NEITHER SIDE UNDERSTANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sometimes, it takes all i have to NOT have a meltdown during my lessons!