Hello I hope things get better for you soon. You really need to try the Dr the truth as soon as you can so that your medication can be adjusted for your benefit and you can feel better. You do not have to go through all of this to the degree of going into a crisis all of the time if you get the help you need. You are not going to scare your Dr by telling them the truth the only thing you have to gain by getting the right medication dose is feeling better. You may want to Pm dr Psisci or Doc John to talk to them if you dont feel that you can talk to your Dr at this time to get some advice from them. I feel that waiting to talk to your Dr is not benefitting you and you need the right medication. I hope you feel better soon. Take care Soidhonia