Thank you all for the responses so far. Today has been a better day so far, it is my sons first birthday so I am trying my best to be positive today and enjoy the day with him and celebrate what has been the best thing in my life. Although I have been depressed for most of his life so far and maybe haven't been as involved as I should be because I just feel isolated I want today to be a good day and I am really focused on that. I have been journaling and trying to exercise but I have been struggling to find the motivation to run. I enjoy running and have run several half marathons and my goal is to eventually run a full marathon but with the depression its been very hard to just get started to train again. I also feel like just opening up on my first post here helped because I was able to just say how I was feeling and not be judged or worry about family and friends thinking I am going to do something to myself and just have a place to express myself fully. Thank you again all have a good day.