I'm sorry about your grandfather. I know it was such a sad loss for you. I was close to my grandfather when I was young, too, and he was78 when he died. It broke my heart. I will say it gets easier with time, I still miss him but mainly remember the good times.

As far as Jake in concerned you need to get over him. He has hurt you over and over. Not to mention he has lied to you many times. You can do better.

I'm sorry about your friend Mikey. Sounds like he was a nice guy with a bad habit.

You will have to mourn all of these relationships. Is there anyway you could get counseling to help you through the grief process? I hope so because it's not easy, especially, with all you have going. Best wishes.