Hmm, I have my emotions and have been able to feel them all, but the anger ones are either muted, explosive or fleeting. The other side of that is that the happier ones are muted as well. My mother would scream in my face, "How dare you be angry at me? Wipe that scowl off your face or I will do it for you." Most often if I showed anything but frightened acceptance i was slapped across the face hard enough to knock me off my feet. I learned to bury my anger and resentment so deeply I cannot access it all yet today.

I am doing better now expressing and feeling anger but it is hard. I often feel panicked or ill when I feel anger. Even knowing why I feel as I do doesn't make it change.

~D~