I understand your younger teenager feelings, I went through that. I would make friends with that aspect of you and work with her (and yourself :-) to explore options between her attitude and having had children. There is a lot in between there that it sounds like you may have missed in some ways. You have a husband, I would teach myself to play around with him/his body, not necessarily for his sake but at your whim. I believe female sexuality is richer than male but the male can feel stronger so we forget the tactile and sensuous female gifts, go straight for the act like they want?