Quote:
Originally Posted by tigergirl
something triggered me badly the other day and kicked off a multiple chain of reactions
I wanted to tell my T about some of the reactions but couldn't because the internal rules and fears were too strong to break through
I tried to talk about some of the rules stopping me instead but the weight of the reactions was to strong and I was getting more and more overwhelmed
T said something that usually would have been fine but instead I had a major over reaction to and ended up having a major melt down
which seems to be continuing now
maybe it was going to happen anyway and didn't really need much of a new trigger
I just feel so alone with everything right now and frustrated with my reactions and the rules which are stopping me sharing things I need help with
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Hey Tigergirl
Awhh, I hate it when we are triggered or have a reaction to something that usually would not affect us. It's like when we are at our most vulnerable out sense of worth drops and our defences go up! Every little thing cuts like a knife and we want help but won't allow anyone in.
You are not alone though, we are here and your t is there...I know you might not want to let him in just now but next time could be different.
I think it shows great growth that recognised this thing that triggered you and affected you so badly. You were aware of your reactions and the chain of events afterwards- so now you can work on how to change that reaction for next time.
You might not feel so good now but this is a positive thing
I hope you can be kind to yourself and not punish yourself today.