For the past year and a little bit I have been an assistant at a daycare. I love the kids, but I constantly worry that all my coworkers think I am horrible at my job and that all the kid's parents think I'm weird. I have nightmares about getting fired all the time. Before that I was an intern/assistant type person for a company that does kid's birthday parties and after school programs. Though I was only in the office, not with the kids for that job. Before that I sorted clothes at Goodwill, but that was through my school's vocational program so I only got $20 a week. It worked out to like $1.50 an hour!

The first two jobs I had I got through my school's vocational program, and the one I have now I only got because I'm related to the owner. I worry all the time that I will never be able to get another job because I come off as too weird. After my second job's hours got cut way back I applied at every place in town that was hiring and some that weren't and never got as much as a call back, except for one place that emailed me and stopped replying when they found out I didn't speak Spanish. (It was a Mexican Restaurant, but they said "fast food" on Craigslist.) So I worry even more about losing my current job. I always worry that I will have to go back into the hospital and I'll lose my job, or if I start cutting again and they find out they'll think I'm too unstable to be around children.

Someday I want to own my own handmade jewelry business online or have a store on Ebay where I find things for cheap, clean them up and sell them for more. But I'm worried I'll get a bad feedback on my first sale and never sell anything again so I haven't started yet. Plus, I don't know if I'd be able to make enough money doing that to support myself. Eventually I want to be able to have my own little brick and mortar shop where I sell a little of everything I love.