Good for you for leaving your husband, You tried everything possible to save it .. The fact you left when he wasnt home because you worried about him beating you ? was he abusive in the relationship?

I don't really get involved in the religious aspect but I will say I doubt that any God would want you to stay in a horrible marriage.

Have you looked into seeing a Therapist ? It's most helpful in processing your relationships good and bad.

Please be proud of yourself for leaving a very unhealthy relationship!