A bit about myself...

I was _recently_ diagnosed with Paranoid Schizophrenia, I've been taking 15mg of Abilify for a week now - I have the side effects, but no relief from symptoms! And the docs said I also have "severe" Dissociative Identity Disorder. And that I show signs of OCD. ~Great

I had two professionals tell me the only reason I wasn't locked up, was because I'm still lucid.

My parents were petitioning for me to be involuntarily hospitalized. I don't understand why. All I wanted was to go back to school.

I'm so lost and confused. I feel like nothing is in my control. I refused meds at first, but then agreed - because my parents were refusing to let me go back to school, oh and I'm 19, college freshman. I really dislike taking meds, of all kinds, but nobody seems to get that. I feel so alone, my family's all I have.

It seems the best way for my parents to trust me, is for me to be honest with them, but some things - I just can't tell them. My dad keeps telling me I've burdened my brother in some way. Problem is, I don't know what I've done - I suppose that's the DID thing coming into play. I guess I don't really understand what's going on, what I have. Mostly, I just don't care anymore.

But, thanks for listening to my rant.