Turning back to alcohol to manage is making me sick. I am terrified to tell because of being thrown into hospital again. My Psych Doc will not prescribe any 'benzos' for me, and my symptoms of depression and anxiety are very bad at times. It got so bad a friend gave me half a clonipin. I am also having headaches every day, they are migraines. I'm miserable. My meds are Effexor 450mg; Wellbutrin 450, abilify 10 and prasosin for nightmares. If I drink I get pretty sick, but I'm at the end of the rope, maybe this is just ranting, but I don't know where else to turn. I cannot take the hospital, I will relapse big time and I had been feeling so much better. Don't know what to do.