Hi and to PC

I'm sorry you're having such a rough time right now. It sounds like you have a ton of different things going on that are affecting your situation.

It might be helpful if you can look at the relationship as much as possible as a separate entity. It sounds from your post (and I know very little of you or your life so take this for what it's worth) that your relationship is currently toxic and you'd be better off without it right now. Its wonderful that you have couples therapy. Maybe that could be a safe place to get some of these things dealt with... and if the relationship doesn't turn into a healthier place, you can always break up and try to be friends.

take care,

I find that talking my problems out helps a lot and that it can be difficul tin real life. So it's helped me loads to type things out here at PC. I hope you can find some help, and that your life gets less stressful soon