Quote:
Originally Posted by Clara22
Hi,
It is hard to feel that way. But I do not understand when you say that you are unlovable. do you really mean it? Because if you are as intelligent as it seems you are, you know that it is not true. Nobody is "unlovable" Such a thing does not exist. Hope I am being clear and I do not come us blunt, sorry I am a non English speaker and my English sucks.
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I'm basing my opinion of my lovability on what I can observe. The only "love" I observe has to with monetary rewards and my skills. It has nothing to do with anything that makes me a person. People may love me, but they love me as an object, not as a person.
Even so, I was referring mainly being loved romantically. For some reason, it's difficult to find someone who even finds me attractive, let alone finds me attractive and will stick around to actually get to know me and is able to find my body acceptable from the neck down.
I just want to be loved romantically, but I realize that's a stupid dream to have.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marla500
sometimes you just need to get it out of your system. allow yourself the minute and distant small thought that you can come back from this. once someone on the threads called it a 'spark.' I loved that, cause I think we all have it no matter how small. it is patient too, it stays there until you are ready! best wishes for you!!  |
The only things that would make me happy would be to get a job in my career field and/or have the guy who I liked (and indicated that he liked me too) would stop ignoring me completely. I mean, if he doesn't like me, why pretend he does? And why even bother with me if you're going to find someone else within the week (I haven't gotten confirmation that this has happened yet, but as it always happens, there's a high probability that he met his real girlfriend immediately following our first "date" which was a very successful so I don't know what I did…I guess I shouldn't have been myself and shouldn't have been truthful. They're probably going to get married. Well, you're welcome! You met your soul mate just trying to get away from me. That must be special).
I'm obviously not even worth a "hi" or "sorry, I'm busy, I can't talk right now". I'm sorry I wasted your time…but to be honest, if you don't want me to think you care about me, don't indicate IN EVERY POSSIBLE WAY that you do.
I didn't have a life after school anyway. I don't have a career…I'm not married/in a relationship like ALL of my peers. I can't stand being the odd person out…never living up to what I'm supposed to be. I can't though…I "expired" back in May.