If there are red flags, with the new guy, and you meet, in a safe place, and you know for fact, one way or another, no need to settle on him.

That said, I am wondering about the panic, you are feeling. As you've mentioned your friendship, with you ex. That, could, wreak havoc for you, in the future, and moving onto a new relationship.

Even, about a platonic, e-mail friendship, that I'd had for years, my therapist said, this, "You'll be far fetched to find a new man, that would remotely put up with this type of friendship, never mind accept it." And that was before I was dating or involved with anyone. It was a decision, I needed to make, about 'that' friendship, because it was quite emotionally involved and in-depth and it was leaving me, emotionally unavailable, to even be back out in the dating world.

So, when someone, did come along, I seriously, don't have to worry about that friendship, taking an ounce of energy away from him. If you are communicating with your ex, on a daily basis, are you going to tell him, to get lost because there's a new man, in your life? It's better to cut ties, for the right reasons, not use a new person as an excuse, to him or even to yourself, as in some ways, your ex becomes a crutch and fall back, regardless, if there is a future between the two of you. And also, why jeopardize, your future, like that?



PS, why not, bring up, to the new guy, your concerns, about 'hey, what happened, your pictures are different?' It's better to ask these questions, directly, than to stew and fester on them...