I agree with mazing, even if someone doesn't necessarily have addictive tendencies, once you have that urge to SI, and you actually follow through with it, it is so incredibly difficult to resist the urges after that. Most likely, you'll always have those urges, but over time they get a lot easier to manage and resist, and they won't pop up as randomly or frequently. While you may always be at risk, just stay strong, and know that things always get better feel free to pm me whenever you have these urges, because I SIed for countless years, and I'm now getting control over my urges and my addiction - I would love to talk to you, or just listen, or become friends with you. Hang in there